you're reading this.

that's either brave or stupid. probably both.

HOMELESS SIMULATOR

a roguelike. they call it that. i call it tuesday.

Dark comedy. Permadeath. Unreliable everything.

you wake up on a park bench.

your mind woke up hours ago.

it hasn't shut up since.

the city of St. Desolation is procedurally generated,

mercilessly funny,

and almost certainly lying to you.

Scavenge dumpsters. Fight raccoons with toilet seat nunchucks. Listen to the voices. Or don't. They're going to talk either way.

things i learned on the street:

  1. every morning is a story no one asked to hear
  2. touch one thing — everything moves
  3. risk is the only thing worth spending
  4. dying is funny if you think about it long enough
  5. trust the voices the voices don't shut up. ever.
  6. you'll come back. they always come back.

the committee weighs in:

tell them about the weapons.

don't tell them anything. they're watching.

TOILET SEAT NUNCHUCKS. SHOPPING CART BATTERING RAM. FROZEN TURKEY LEG THAT THAWS INTO LUNCH.

...the weapons are improvised.

and the sanity system. tell them how—

NO.

when your sanity drops, reality stops cooperating. the screen lies. the UI lies. enemies appear that may or may not exist.

the game never confirms what's real.

THE PIGEONS ARE ALWAYS REAL

nothing is real

...anyway.

evidence i collected:

The streets of St. Desolation
"people walk fast when they see us"
The POCKETS inventory system
"you've started an ecosystem"

how it usually goes:

MIN 1-3

"I have nothing. I found a rusty pipe. I ate something out of a trash can. I feel... okay?"

MIN 4-7

"I have a shopping cart full of weapons and a pigeon familiar. I just fought off a pack of rats in a Subway bathroom."

MIN 8-11

"Businessmen are throwing coins at me that deal damage. I found a portal to a parking garage dimension. My sanity is at 12%."

MIN 12-15

"I'm fighting the Shelter bouncer — a 6-foot raccoon in a trench coat — with a stop sign. I have 2 HP and half a hot dog."

I win.

STATUS: IN DEVELOPMENT

ENGINE: Godot 4 / GDScript

PLATFORM: Steam (Windows / Mac / Linux)

RATING: R — no limits.

DEVELOPER: one person who should probably be doing something else

i should go.

it's getting dark. the kind of dark that has teeth.

if you want to know more, read the transmissions.

or don't.

the voices said you wouldn't make it this far.

wishlist coming. maybe. if i can find the library computer again.